Groundhogs and the Self Defense Dildo

SeeBeeWrite: damn groundhog got into the trash can again
ClockworkMustang: shoot it
ClockworkMustang: poison it
ClockworkMustang: send your vicious little dog after it
SeeBeeWrite: i've shot it twice
SeeBeeWrite: either i have bad aim and or the groundhog is insanely strong
SeeBeeWrite: maybe ill use hollow point next time
ClockworkMustang: varmint bombs
ClockworkMustang: it's a .223 round. hollow. causes small animals to basically explode.
SeeBeeWrite: he's no small animal
ClockworkMustang: almost zero ricochet potential. no overpenetration.
SeeBeeWrite: how do you think he tipped over my trash can? my CITY-ISSUE trash can
ClockworkMustang: just enter animal, extreme fragmentation, and varmint is SHREDDED.
SeeBeeWrite: i dont think im the only person who has taken a shot at him either
ClockworkMustang: maybe he gave it a dramatic look
SeeBeeWrite: he lives over a wide area. like 6 yards. and they're all pretty spread out from each other
ClockworkMustang: get an old bear trap
SeeBeeWrite: fuckin groundhog. it's probably gonna die under my shed
ClockworkMustang: CLANG! SQUISH!
ClockworkMustang: dinner!

Which somehow evolved into:

ClockworkMustang: The Self Defense Dildo
SeeBeeWrite: i'll pass
ClockworkMustang: you might. but there could be a market.
SeeBeeWrite: oh, i'm sure
ClockworkMustang: Behold, the Pavco Killdo
ClockworkMustang: so many uses
ClockworkMustang: 1) sex toy
ClockworkMustang: 2) carry it in the pants for easy access, and makes you look like you have a HUGE wang
ClockworkMustang: 3) beat muggers to death
SeeBeeWrite: why would i want to look like i have a huge wang?
ClockworkMustang: not women. well, not MOST women
ClockworkMustang: i suppose a possible rapist would think twice before grabbing a woman if he thinks she has a huge penis
SeeBeeWrite: i see
ClockworkMustang: makes a strange kinda sense NOW, huh?