Saturday, May 29, 2010

Sometimes It's Roses and Sometimes It's Weeds

Some snippets of life this week:

My mom must have really awful gaydar. She can spot a gay man from a mile away, but never knows who is a lesbian. For example, she only figured out that Melissa Etheridge was gay when she went to a Melissa Etheridge concert and saw a lot of women holding hands. And even then she didn't figure it out right away. She was confused for at least half of the concert before it dawned on her.
She also played softball when I was a kid, and she didn't know that 2/3 of her teammates were lesbians. I think I knew it before she did, and I was seven.

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I feel like I need some big change right now. I need to move away, go on a trip, DO something. But it won't happen, because I wouldn't want to go alone, and there's nobody to go with me.

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Hormones still haven't had an opportunity to level out. I'm avoiding iTunes, and I just keep playing the same Metallica CD in the car all the time, even though the CD player is shitty and skips through the songs at random. I cried when Lydia rolled off the couch. I cried when I heard a sad song. I was tremendously sad when a bird egg fell out of the nest onto my back porch. I cried when my back hurt and nothing would get rid of the pain.
I am very weepy lately, and I suspect it's mostly to do with the fact that I got prescribed birth control pills, started taking them, and then was told to stop taking them after only ten days, which means I got to have wonderful periods twice this month, a week apart. Also, the whole nasty break-up thing in which I nurture a burning hatred for my ex-boyfriend who morphed into a huge douchebag over the course of six months before ceasing communication with me.

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If it's not heartburn, it's nausea. So... if it's not Tums, it's promethazine. I'm a walking pharmacy, and it is depressing. I feel like shit, man. I can't wait for my consultation on Tuesday.

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